I'm As Free As A Bird! (And I Don't Know What To Do With Myself...)

I figure that the best way to introduce myself is to simply be myself and not have explain the trivial details.

...Why?

Because the short story is that I'm not an interesting person.

Hell, I don't even know why a boring person like me would have a blog, but I digress. I've read others and I find them fascinating to read so I figured that this could be fun with the right amount of caffeine in me *points to blog title* -or at least that's what I assume here. It could go horribly wrong and I'll go on a whiplash-inducing tangent and leave you hanging with your heads between your knees. Okay, so maybe that's not what people who've suffered whiplash do but you (whoever you may be but I think I have an idea of that) know what I mean?

Ah, whatever. We'll play this by ear and see how this goes. Oh and by the way, if you're wondering about the kind of vocab I'm using, it's because I've read so much I'm like a human dictionary. New words are interesting to me and I used to be a bit of an English-class nut. Not so much any more thanks to the university-level introductory English class I took in first year (Literary Forms, Themes and Approaches to be more specific) zapped all the fun in it. But, I do post fanfiction and read whenever I can so I suppose it helps maintain the range of words I know and use. I fall victim to the occasional typo or missing word, but it's nothing big. At least I'm not like the people who screw up on their homonyms at- Every. Fucking. Opportunity.

...Okay, I'd better stop there on that note about homonyms since it's a major pet peeve of mine and I'm sure no good will come out of talking about that.

God, this is getting weird already. I should probably attempt going on-topic here concerning the title of this post. 'Cause I'm sure that it didn't say, 'Angry Rant About People Who Can't Spell Worth Shit!' Haha.

I finished my last exam today (accounting) and I'm not quite sure about how to feel about it, really. Well, concerning the exam itself, I'm sure that I did alright but not up to where I'd like to be grade-wise. I'd like an 80 at the very least, but I might have to be realistic here. Then again, I tend to low-ball my grade estimates unintentionally, but on the other hand, I don't want to keep that tendency in mind in case if I didn't do as well as I'd hoped. But whatever, I know I passed so at least I still have that going for me.

What I don't know what I feel about is how I'm going to spend this vacation and make it worthwhile before I go on an Accounting co-op term in Windsor (about 3-4 hours away from where I live). After a party last month (which had kick-ass music by the way *cough* Goo Goo Dolls *cough*), I know that I'm not really with the whole drinking thing. I've come to the conclusion that it's really pointless (and for the record, I came to this late conclusion at 19 because I'm late for every fucking thing normal teenagers are socially inclined to do).

I mean, you could give me ten bucks' worth of Diet Pepsi and I'd be a million times happier than if you gave me a four-pack of vodka coolers. Before I ever had any experience with alcohol, I'd always wondered what I'd be like drunk. At that party I had four vodka coolers and found out my answer (and I could be wrong in my assumption here); I stay the same mentally and get really wobbly. Whoop-di-freaking-do. I am seriously missin' the memo here.

So with that scratched off the list, I know I'll be a wet blanket at this thing I'm going to with some old friends from high school where we basically have a potluck dinner, a mystery gift exchange and I presume boozing after if I'm reading between the lines correctly. Oi.

Well, maybe it won't be that bad since it's not like we're doing this at a club/bar where I get forced to dance against my will (and I do mean that quite seriously - my friends have threatened to grind against me if I didn't start dancing on the floor with them).

Either way, I know that I'll have Rock Band 2 and my fanfiction to fall back on, but sometimes I wonder if I could do something better with my time even though I enjoy both things very much. I don't know, really.

Do social kids feel this way or am I the only one because I'm in my head too much?

Ugh. I'm not going to lie. I'm going to feel a little empty inside like I always do, even with people around. I'd tell myself to get laid but then again, I look like I'm 13-15 so I assume guys would assume I'm jailbait. Haha.

So is this random enough for you guys?

*you nod*

I thought so. ;)

Oh, and when I left from my exam this guy who's had this obvious crush on me this fall term (we started being sort-of acquaintances/friends the winter term before this) sort of kissed the side of my head near my ear after we walked to my car. I knew that something was coming while we were walking and I was afraid that he'd try to kiss me since I knew that I'd probably react badly. It's a shame that I don't like him that way. I feel bad. No one deserves to be strung along like that on false hope.

Cause all I ever wanted so far gone, and if I had my chance I'd go along...